Joseph Denis Patry

Joseph Denis Patry (Denny, Denis, Dad, Papa) 1944-2024

It is with heavy hearts that we announce the passing of Denis Patry, aged 80, who passed away the weekend of October 26th, 2024 at his apartment in Ottawa. A loving father, grandfather, sibling, and friend, he passed away in his sleep, exactly as he would have wanted. Active until the end … still riding his bike every day, taking the 9 flights of stairs to his apartment, jumping in the lake or the pool (sometimes head-first!!), going out to his book club, and being with his grandkids at every opportunity! We expected him to be with us 10 more years… he had just turned 20 with 60 years of experience!

Given there is no funeral being held, here, instead of a Eulogy, is a look back on his journey…

Denis was kind-hearted, always up for a conversation – he was the person who would always make a friend in the grocery store line-up! He’d drop anything to be there for those he loved. He cared deeply for his close family, kids, and grandkids. 

He was born and raised in Ottawa.  He grew up on Willow Street (in what is now called Little Italy). In the early 1970’s he met his to-be-wife, Micheline, and in 1975-76 they got married, designed and built (themselves) their first family home on Skyridge Road in the Gatineau hills, and had their daughter, Karen. The family moved to Edmonton Alberta from 1978-83, where his son Kevin was born. They moved back to Ottawa for many years and later from 1996 to 2000 he moved to Vancouver, BC with Kevin; there for employment with a Habitat for Humanity project. 

Denis was a natural and patient teacher, who would work through a DIY project with anyone using encouragement and instruction. Working alongside Denis building anything from a basement reno to a full-sized garage was a great way to spend time with him, listening to his stories, as well as learn trade skills – given his knack to teach as he went. His ability to problem-solve engineering, construction, and woodworking challenges was uncanny. A real-life ‘MacGyver’ – he could fix anything with a few scraps of wood, screws, PL premium and some duct tape!

Although he spent his career and had strong competencies in construction he had a love for books. If asked his favorite thing … it would be books. They were his main hobby - non-fiction, in particular. He left this world (specifically his grandkids) with a library full of books to cherish. His sister, Estelle, had just finished a big effort working with him to catalogue his book collection when he passed. He especially loved the super-natural and could talk all day about that which most don’t understand about the universe. During his kids’ childhood, every Saturday he would take them for breakfast to Bagel-Bagel in the Market, and then go visit Sunshine Books to pick up an unusual read while the kids admired the special crystals on display. Although he never officially got a degree, he spent time in the early 70’s at Carleton University attending Psychology lectures for interest. This is where he met Micheline – in Southam Hall during a psych lecture.

Denis attended Ottawa Technical High School specializing in Architectural Drafting and Building Construction Technology and took computer programming at Algonquin. He went on to be a Building Construction Site Superintendent, after also having been a building inspector, planner, surveyor, and a mapping and photogrammetry specialist. His employers as a Foreman and other roles included Minto, Defense Construction Canada, Cavan Construction, Atcon Developments, and Macdonald Development Ltd. His proud projects included the development of: The Rimbey General Hospital in Alberta; A seniors residence in Wainwright Alberta; A townhouse complex on Royal Oak Way in Ottawa; A 29-unit 4-story mixed residential/commercial building in Vancouver (which was a joint-project with Habitat for Humanity); and a shopping plaza in Orleans which housed a Colour-your-world store, a Swiss Chalet, and a Harvey’s [also known as his two favourite restaurants – other than Red Lobster for his birthdays!]. He also volunteered for Habitat for Humanity later in life. A life in construction being grueling, both mentally and physically, he later stopped this line of work and focused on helping with his wife’s small businesses. In retirement Denis continued to do small construction projects, mainly for friends and family.

When you think of Denis though, it’s not all books and construction. He was extremely giving of his time to the people in his life. He patiently taught his kids and granddaughters to drive! He was a fun grandpa - he would run around and play, climb hills, put his grandkids on the roof, teach them how to be safe, jump off the high cliffs with them, take them biking! He would always be there to take his kids or grandkids (and all their friends!) anywhere, anytime, day or middle-of-the-night, making sure they were safe. He went out of his way to go pick up his kids’ friends for school and drive them every day. When his grandkids came, he was in “papa” heaven, spoiling them with his time. He couldn’t buy them much, but he would give them his time, and they loved him for it (… including his life-lessons!). He even made hundreds of small blocks for his grandkids when they were young, cutting and sanding every one of them by hand destined to be the ultimate giant-Jenga game (those will stand the test of time and go to his great-grandkids one day). He also had a great love of swimming. After work he’d take his kids to the pool almost every evening – Clifford Bowey pool. Fun pool dad every night!! He also loved his sci-fi TV… the Star Trek series, or Quantum Leap, and the like, always playing in the background. 

Denis traveled some. He and Micheline traveled across Europe early in their relationship. One of his favourite stories to tell was how they found themselves on the roof of the Vatican standing by the large statues of the saints. He said they may look small from below but are giant! He also traveled to South America, and across the US. His preferred trip was to cross Canada by car. He did it many times living on the west coast, with and without the kids. The last cross-Canada trip was in 2017 when he took his granddaughter, Erica, across to Vancouver - camping along the way - where they ended the trip with a visit with his son Kevin/her Uncle Kevin and his family. He also joined his daughter on a drive down to Florida in 2012 with her three kids where he spent time with Micheline, and his brother Marc and his wife Louisette, followed by a family cruise. He preferred to have his feet on the ground though so flying and cruising, as it turns out, was not his thing!

Then there was The Lake. Lake Clear. Denis spent his entire life going to Lake Clear, near Eganville, Ontario. His parents purchased a place on Mulberry Lane in the early 50's where he spent his childhood vacations. He claimed the Patry’s were the first to own a boat on the lake. Going out to the islands to explore, jumping off the cliffs, catching cray fish, fishing, waterskiing (accidents and all, yikes!) and building the best lake rafts from barrels and studs (pictures below)! The cottage was a great family refuge – bringing everyone in the Patry clan together over the years. In the 1980’s “The Raft” (the second model) was born from the hands of Denis, his father and brothers who built it from scratch but even bigger than the 1950’s version. On 4 floating hand-made pontoons, it stood 2 stories high, with diving boards off the top and a huge engine capable of moving the large structure. The family would cruise around the lake, everyone running and jumping off the top diving boards while the motor was running, then pulling themselves into the pontoon by a rope and jump again! What fun! During the building of the pontoon boat his index finger got caught in the cord of the drill; he near lost it. The damage made his finger point in a different direction – a later ongoing joke if he was trying to point at you but really he’d end up pointing off to the left!  After his parents sold the property in the late 90’s, the draw to Lake Clear was always strong and he kept going whenever possible. He spent his last few years enjoying it again at his daughter’s place on the lake. Spending time paddleboarding and having “mat wars” with his grandson Ian (mainly losing that battle!). He had this funny thing he’d do to avoid the cold-water shock. He’d build up the courage and then just jump in and splash about until the cold wore off. Caught on video – a signature Denis move! When asked in 2023 what his happiest memories were, his response was: swimming together, campfire time, boating and canoeing to the islands, walking in the water near the islands… all lake memories! He also said he loved going to the movies, and he enjoyed getting ‘chips’ – Denis Patry always knew where the best Ottawa valley chip trucks were located!  

In his retirement he took a great deal of interest in researching healthy ways of living, and then imparting those learnings on those he loved (mainly in very long text’s, lol). Although he passed away from what is believed to be a heart failure (arteriosclerosis) which can naturally happen with age, he was otherwise in great physical condition and had all his mental faculties to the very end. He was quite active. He even took a video of himself biking a few days before he passed showing his daughter he was “in fact” wearing the bike helmet she insisted he start wearing. 

He is pre-deceased by his life/parenting partner and ex-wife, Micheline O’Shaughnessy. Although they separated for many years, and eventually divorced, their deep friendship and co-parenting endured. They lived together multiple times during their life – including together in White Lake for a few years in retirement where Denis was happy to putter on odd household jobs and cross the street to the beach to swim. Unfortunately, this was followed by Micheline’s struggle with dementia when she was required to move to long-term care. Denis spent the last 8 years of his life in Ottawa’s Westboro area in a +60-apartment building living his independent life. He’d jokingly complain about all the “old” people he had to talk to going in and out of the place, but secretly he was part of the clan and loved to chat - he made some good friends there! During this time, he took advantage of living near his daughter’s family, the river and bike paths, and Tim Hortons where he’d spend countless hours with friends. 😊 He also spent his last few years enjoying the company of his new partner, Lorraine, who brought him joy and companionship.

Denis is survived by his daughter, Karen (Rob) Sibley and their children, Erica 19, Abigail 17 and Ian 13 (Ottawa, ON); by his son Kevin and his two sons, Bowen 12 and Beckett 10 (Vancouver BC). He is also survived by his two younger sisters who he also considered his closest friends Estelle (Doug) Essex and Rose-Ann Patry (Art Manhire); as well as his older brother, Alderic (Monique) Patry, and two younger brothers Lionel (Barb) Patry and Marcel Patry. Although he has many nieces and nephews, great-nieces and great-nephews; he was particularly close to his nephew Bill (Shannon) Essex, and his niece Kelly (Steve) McKibbin. He is also survived by his close friend and companion, Lorraine Stofa (Petawawa).

He is pre-deceased by his parents Lillian and Rene Patry, and younger brother, Vincent Patry; as well as his life-partner and ex-wife, Micheline O’Shaughnessy.

The family held a private family viewing and will hold private masses in his name in locations close to those who loved him. Burial decisions are yet to be determined.

He will be deeply missed.

A photo gallery is below… take a peek!  The life and journey of Denis Patry…. (scroll arrows to the left for most recent).